Grey's Anatomy always ends with really meaningful quotes to me:
The night before I decided to seek out Tracy (who I saw before seeing Jane), I watched a Grey's Anatomy episode from season 2. In that episode, it ended with the lines: "Life doesn't have to be this hard." And, right then, I thought, "I need to find a way out of this." True story. The next day, I typed into google "Eating Disorder Nutritionist." (I just wanted someone to tell me it was okay to eat, and tell me what to eat and when... I didn't want to go to no therapy, yo!) Funny how you can be in denial about the fact that you have an eating disorder, yet you know that the right people to go to are those who specialize in eating disorders.
Tonight's Grey's Anatomy episode ended with this quote, which speaks to me in many ways. It reminds me of challenging yourself with food. It makes me think of eating even when you feel fat. It makes me think of living fully regardless of your weight. It makes me think of seeking out relationships, and trying to develop them, letting people get closer to you. People say "Ah, recovery feels so great." And they talk about what it's like to feel normal around food and body, and they use that end point to motivate you to keep going.... but few people talk about what the path is actually like. People say it's "hard," but no one really fleshes out what "hard" means. People talk about "oh, but once you let yourself trust and be loved, it's so great," But no one really talks about the discomfort you feel when you have to push yourself to let others in. No one really depicts that part in detail.
It's not a secret that growing pains exist.
But no one really describes them in great detail.
Anyway, here's the quote:
The relentless climb.
The pain and anguish of taking it to the next level.
Nobody takes pictures of that.
Nobody wants to remember
We just want to remember the view from the top
the breathtaking moment at the edge of the world
that's what keeps us climbing
and it's worth the pain
that's the crazy part
it's worth anything.
What does this quote make you think of?
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this makes me think of the constant back and forward, back and forward, that seems to be trying to recovery. It's so true, that quote, who wants to remember the times they cried over their breakfast because it all got too hard, ugh! I am sick of crying over any of my food, or freaking out when my pants don't fit right that day. I wish I could look out and see the end, but there doesn't seem to be an end, will there ever be an end, what does the end look like. Will I actually really be happy like I am told I will. What does this quote mean to me UGH! That's what it means. Okay, having a bad day here, so I may be feeling a little negative!
ReplyDelete*hugs*
Sarah
Actually this makes me think of an important lesson I learnt in recovery, to enjoy and appreciate the process, rather than just focusing on end goals all the time. For example I would focus on my disatisfaction with a painting, rather than the time I spent enjoying the painting process. Conversely I used to keep imagining some end goal in recovery rather than appreciating the small steps I was making towards it each day.
ReplyDeleteI think to me this says every moment is precious, both good and bad, because we learn something from everything we experience that means more than any single end goal alone.
Sarah x
this makes me think about how sometimes it seems like the climb will never end. But thinking about this, I realized it is probably because I have turned back so many times. Of course the climb will never end if i keep turning around when it gets hard, stopping and starting again, ect. I just need to keep pushing forward.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this!
This makes me hungry. Or maybe because I'm not eating right. Stupid cat.
ReplyDeleteThinking back over the work I've done the past 2 years I don't want to remember any of it. I just want to be normal. The more I recover the more I find out that there is normal. We all are a little off sometimes. The problem is the "normal" types don't let a screwed up meal lead them into disordered eating for a month or so.
It reminds me of a similar quote from a movie or TV show (I forget exactly where). I think it was a comment on how (usually) everybody is smiling in photos, and just looking at photos can be misleading, because nobody takes pictures of the unhappy times when no one's smiling.
ReplyDeleteAnd that makes me think about why we only take photos of the happy times. Obviously it's because those are the times we want to remember, not the sad times.
And that makes me think about how I tend to think more about unhappy memories than happy ones. If I'm not looking at photos, if it's just me alone with my thoughts, then I dwell too much on the sad parts. If I don't want to keep unhappy moments around in my photos, I shouldn't be keeping them around in my head either.
I've been having a stressful, mostly negative day...Reading your post actually inspired me to start thinking of something more positive and keep that focused in my mind instead.
Thank you.
i seriously love grey's quotes. my fave of all time i actually blogged about - it was from alex, and he said "sometimes you have to get messed up to step up."
ReplyDeletethanks for sharing this. :)
I love Grey's quotes, too!!! This is a great one.
ReplyDeleteThat one makes me think of grad school. Or, I'd rather link it to grad school than food, at least. I think because the "relentless climb" seems just a little easier to my PhD than working out the food issues... Which I don't even like to blog much about.
Honestly, it makes me think of Miley Cyrus..."It's all about the cliiiimb" and before you make fun...I quite like the song, 'The Climb', so I appreciate this quote [Who narrated? Meredith?].
ReplyDeleteAll the Grey's quotes that I love are the silly ones, hehe. For example, "You sooo sexxxxxy"-Cristina, drunk on Tequila.
Well, pretty much anything Cristina or Bailey say.
I'm really just a Grey's Season 1 & Season 2 junky. It's from Grey's that I discovered many great musical artists. Are you familiar with Tegan&Sara? :)