Even though I worked at the fro yo shop for 13 hours today, I had a pretty happy day. It started with the wonderful cup of coffee. Then I noticed, as I was getting dressed, listening to music, that I was dancing as I was getting dressed. I didn't plan to dance - I just... spontaneously was dancing. That made me happy.
At some parts of the day, I found myself bored or annoyed for no reason in particular, but I found a way to enjoy the moment. EX: This guy came in and ordered a milkshake. He wasn't particularly talkative or friendly (dude - WHY ARE PEOPLE NOT FRIENDLY SOMETIMES?! LIKE, IF I TALK TO YOU... TALK BACK - DON'T JUST STARE AT ME! HELLO! EVER HEARD OF FRIENDLY CONVERSATION? IT GOES LIKE THIS: HOW ARE YOU? GOOD. HOW ARE YOU. OH, I'M EXCELLENT THANK YOU! I LIKE YOUR SHIRT. THANKS, I LIKE YOURS. THANKS. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S RAINING OUT. I KNOW, IT NEVER RAINS! ARE YOU HAVING A GOOD WEEKEND? YES, I BUILT A FORT WITH MY DAUGHTER. OH, I BET SHE LOVED THAT!..... OKAY, THAT IS HOW YOU HAVE A CONVERSATION. JUST SAYING.....)
Anyway, back to whatever I was talking about. So, this guy ordered a milkshake. And I sorta - REALLY -hate making milkshakes... coz it like, takes time, and then you have to wash the blender, and - complain complain... so I was kind aannoyed at this unfriendly dude while I was making him a milkshake. I felt like frowning at him. I was not in a good mood while I was making the milkshake. But, as I was pouring the whole milk (and while I do this the calorie count of whole milk per cup pops in my head. lovely. Hello, number memorizing part of my brain!) ... I think to myself that nothign is actually that bad. So, physically, how am I doing? I'm fine. Holding a gallon of milk. Bending over a bit... but yeah, nothing really hurts. So what am I doing right now? I AM GETTING TO MAKE THIS GUY SOMETHING THAT WILL HELP HIM ENJOY HIS NIGHT! THAT'S PRETTY NEAT! When I started to see the act of making the milkshake as an opportunity to help make this guy have a nice night, I suddenly was perfectly content making the milkshake.
EX: this customer came in and she just would NOT smile. I was all friendly to her but she was just like "give me chocolate." yes, maam. and, yeah, it's TOTALLY FINE YOU DIDN'T SAY PLEASE! So I was annoyed at her and I felt like lecturing her on her behavior (ever since being a teacher I sorta feel the right to lecture random strangers on their behavior....) But then I thought that maybe this woman has been mistreated by the world. Maybe she needs to be shown that there is love for her in this world. So I was nice to her anyway. And it made me happy, because instead of thinking "I'm nice to you and you're not being nice to me, meanie!!!" I was thinking "I have this awesome opportunity to show you that the world can be nice! Look, look, the world can be nice to you." And approaching it that way warmed my heart. I felt happy to be a part of improving her world by showing her kindness. You know?
Then I closed the whole fro yo store by myself (I'm actually still sitting here... but all the work is done). It's a lot of work to do it. So, I just turned up the music, reminded myself that there's no time limit, was grateful for this quiet moment. When I mopped, instead of seeing it as a chore, I sort of saw it as rhythmic and calming.... like dancing. When I poured water on my head (yeah... I actually did that... long story...), at first I thought: EW! But then I thought: HILARIOUS! And then there was my opportunity to laugh - so I did - and then I called my dad to tell him I just poured water on my head. He had no idea what I was talking about, but it doesn't matter. Then I hung up the phone and continued on my merry way.
Not all days are like this. Some days you're just down. You're just pissed off. You just don't feel like smiling. So I'm grateful for the days when you do feel like smiling.
I also looked up some full time jobs that I could potentially apply for today. I really need to buckle down at some point and apply to them. I should mark it on my calendar or something.
So, guess what I'm about to go do? I am about go use my tip money to buy food so that I have food for breakfast. Currently, I do not have much food in my house - especially not for breakfast. I need to go grocery shopping. But I don't want to spend money and I keep unexpecedly having to spend money - so, i'll use tip money - b/c that's like free money!
It is 11:21 pm. I am NEVER going toi sleep tonight. I'm sooo hyper. I am such a spaz! Wow.
"oh wow..." that's what my students used to say all the time. "oh wow...." I hated the way they said that so much that I out lawed the use of that phrase in my class. I'm dead serious. The students were like "What the eff, Ms! WE can't say that?!" And I was like "No, y'all, you can't say that!" And they were like "You're weird." And I explained to them that I don't have a problem with "oh" or "Wow" but I have a problem with the tone of "oh wow" it sounds like this: naaaaa-naaaa (did you hear that? lol) it has this naaa-naaa tone to it. I told them they can't say anything ever with the naaaa-naaaa tone. You all have no idea what I'm talking about. It' slike... the tone starts low, goes up, then goes low again. Ah! I hate it.
What else do I hate? I hate not knowing where the universe ends. like, okay, I'm in a chair. that chair is in a store. that store in in CA. CA is in the US. The US is on the planet earth. the planet earth is in the solar system. the solar system is in the milky way galaxy. The milky way galaxy is in our universe. And our universe is in..... what?! We understand everything b/c we understand things relative to other things. We understand things based on their context. But what the hell is the context of the universe?
Any one else's head about to explode?
Um, yeah.
Ok - I'm going to go to the grocery store now. Then home.
Tomorrow, I REALLY REALLY REALLYR EALLY REALLY REALLYR EALLY TIMES INFINITY want to run in the morning. I've been looking forward to a run all day! But I have a big feeling my knee/leg is going to act up and I should not run if that's the case b/c I don't want to be sidelined for months like I was in the summer! So, wish me luck that this running business works tomorrow. Really, though, it's so annoying. Why can't people who don't' like running get the knee/leg injuries? Then it doesn't matter!
anyway... it was a decent day....
DECENT DAY 51
FOOD:
B: a packet of oatmeal, 1 or 2 (i forget) spoonfuls of crushed almonds, 2 spoonfuls of raisins, 1/2 a banana, 1/2 a spoonful of chocolate chips, 2 spoonfuls of granola.
L: salad: lettuce, a couple spoonfuls of black beans, a couple pinches of cheese, red and green peppers, a couple spoonfuls of corn, + a container of southwestern eggwhite salad from trader joe's + 2 spoonfuls of low-fat southwestern ranch dressing
D: Same as last night: Trader Joe's prepared meal Tandoori Butter Chicken (360 cal, 10g fat, 29g protein): tandoori chicken, sauce, raisins, butternut squash, spinach, peppers, rice)
**I worked at the fro yo store from 10am - 11pm (13 hrs) today with no break and all alone. In that time, I ate fro yo and spoonfuls of ice cream throughout the day (realizing I was doing so was usually my cue that I was hungry I noticed). I didn't get out of control with it. I'd say, in total, I probably had around 4 - 6 - 8 oz of fro yo (I put fro yo in a 4 oz cup, but, all three times I did this, I never finished the cup at all... so I'll say this all accumulates to 4 or 6 or 8 oz of fro yo. I ate about and I had 2 spoonfuls of ice cream. That's all fine by me.
THOUGHTS:
I noticed myself a coupel of times slipping into "I'm not allowed to eat" thoughts, but I quickly caught myself, remembering Tracy's message of : you are allowed to eat foods you enjoy. You are allowed to be happy."
I did not count calories
I did spend a wee bit of time justifying eating, (ex: at the end of my day, to convince myself I didn't eat too much I reminded myself that I had 3 meals that were not anywhere close to too big, I had one fro yo snack, and, that seems normal and fine. that's not overeating) but it didn't feel like it was taking over my day.
Overall, I had a pretty normal day. A much more mentally normal day than yesterday.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
i really admire you working at the fro yo. I have thought tons of times about getting a part time job at a bakery, or a video store, or something ANYTHING different from the 9-5 office job I used to work. Connecting with the outside world seems like a great way to maintain some sense of normalcy.
ReplyDeleteYou should! Get to a place of good enough physical health to allow you to work at a part time job!
ReplyDeleteI used to be a teacher. Now, nothing ever can stress me out because I can always say "I could be having to lesson plan" or "I could be having to manage 30 kids' behavior right now." The fro yo job is the leas stressful job ever - you can't fail, you get to talk to the public, free fro yo... it's pretty fantastic.
i'm excited to start reading your blog. i wanted to thank you for all the comments and support you have given me through blogxygen. it means a lot. :)
ReplyDeleteso, nice to "meet" you.
Oh my, this post sounds like you are on uppers! But it's cute :)
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like Milkshakes:Fro Yo::Frappucinos:Starbucks. HATED, LOATHED making frappucino. I wish I could have developed your positive outlook while doing them!
On the note of customers, the female you described reminded me of a very common Starbucks customer. They walk up to the counter, stare, and then say, "Uhhh, gimme Caramel Frappucino", or, "Give me a latte".
That always bothered me. I thought it was common...polite-knowledge[?] to say, "I'd like..." or "May I have...", even just "Grande Nonfat Caramel Machiatto, please". The "Give me" just...it always through me off. *End Rant*
Anyway, this post made me smile. It was so "Let's look at the positive side of this..." and cute and funny.
[I want December 23rd to come so that, when I write, I no longer sound like Debbie Downer and can sound more like Laura-Upper! Im so tired of whining! But man, I just want the semester and my financial woes to END].