What is up? I feel so sleepy and weak today. I got enough sleep. I am eating enough. But it seems like I'm just a bottomless pit. I keep feeling like I have zero energy. Maybe it's because I've stopped exercising essentially? I don't know but I feel like it'd be a chore to even lift my arms up to grab someting. Pathetic. I just ate a slice of bread with PB on it and 10 cashews without really thinking. I was planning on going on a walk, but as soon as I walked into the kitchen to get a drink of water, I just sort of went on autopilot and ate. I felt weak before hand (so maybe I was eating out of hunger). I used to let unplanned eating episodes like this turn into a big non-stop-eating session followed by more restriction than normal for a period of time. I'd end up overcompensating and feeling horribly guilty and hating myself. At least that isn't happening this time...... ? But I don't think this weakness thing is hunger because I still feel weak even having eaten. I feel like I should purposely try not to eat the rest of the day but that is not the way I'm trying to eat so I'm going to stay away from that rule. I'm just having difficulty discerning hunger for weakness right now, which is annoying.
This is a pretty lame post. I moved a few things into my new apt this morning. Then I spent the whole day painting my roommate's new apartment. Now I'm waiting in Panera (restaraurant with free wifi) for a colleague. I have a lot of 8th grade Algebra resources. She is coming to meet me with her flash drive so she can get the resources since she'll also be teaching that (at a different school) next year. Then I'm going to work at the frozen yogurt store. Our flavors rotate every day and today we have chocolate peanut butter (my favorite). I'll try not to eat too much of it.
I feel like I shouldn't eat the rest of the day, but I know that making that rule is wrong. I guess I'll just keep letting myself eat if I think I feel hungry (and I'll just assume this weakness is partial hunger? I have no idea!) and I'll be careful not to overeat. And I guess I'll keep drinking water so I know I'm hydrated? I don't know. I don't like this weakness thing though. It makes me want to eat and it makes it difficult to know if I'm hungry.
Maybe you are weak because all of the stuff you've been doing has caught up with you? You keep pretty busy and maybe it has finally caught up with you. It happens. Maybe you're getting sick? We all have days when we feel that weakness for what we think is no apparent reason, but you body just wants you to rest for the day. Take it easy. I know you're working. It doesn't have anything to do with your food, so keep on eating, babe. Okay?! I hope you feel better tomorrow. Get a good night's sleep. I know you've been sleeping but get more. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks, PTC. And thanks for the reminder that it has nothing to do with my food - I needed to hear that. I ate a little bit more - half of a child's frozen yogurt - but, really, the whole evening (even while working), I just wanted to lie down and feel a breeze blow over me or something like that. I don't actually feel very good right now. My body is achey, my ears hurt, and I'm super bloated for whatever reason. It's likely I'll wake up feeling totally normal, but, for now, I'm relaxing in bed with no alarm set.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you are getting sick. I hope you feel better. Take care of yourself.
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