Eating when hungry and PT

Hey Everyone,

This is a quick post because I'm writing it while "borrowing" some random internet that I get in the parking lot of my apt. complex. The name of the internet I'm borrowing is "XXX," which I think is creepy. It's also creepy that I'm in my car in the parking lot at midnight. But I wanted to see what you all were up to!

Today I really focused on letting myself eat when I'm hungry. Amazing, suddenly I'm thinking about food less again. Just two days ago I left a message on my nutritionists machine saying that I don't care and I'm tired of thinking about food and I don't like doing this and I just want to settle for whatever and be done. Then I realized that what had changed over the past few days was that I was avoiding eating when I was hungry. I was getting by on as little as possible. Just an old habit I fell into - it wasn't purposeful. So, now that I realized that, yesterday and today I felt free again - just like I had felt when I first stopped calorie counting. Today my eating was good. Small breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, snack. Always ate out of hunger. Always ate the right amount given how hungry I was (I think). Never felt too full. Ate what I was craving. I felt very ALLOWED to eat. That is the key for me - to have that mindset where I am allowed to eat no matter waht time of day, no matter what I just ate, no matter nothing. When I truly feel that, I feel free and I end up eating better anyway.

I like what you said, Lisa, about intuitive eating NOT meaning perfect eating. that is a helpful thing to remember and I will most definitely try to keep that in mind. It'll save me from a lot of guilt and compensation if I can remember that.

I had physical therapy today for the first time. I'm going to have it 3x a week. The physical therapist is really nice. She diagnosed me with IT-band tendonitis. Basically, I don't use my glutes (butt muslces) when I walk/run/squat/do anything that you should use them. As a result, my upper thigh muscles play the role of butt muscle too. But, when you run too much/often, your upper thigh muscles can't keep up with a non-functioning glute, so your IT band tries to help out. But your IT band isn't a muscle, so it doesn't work - so it just gets inflamed. When it gets inflamed, it isn't as effective at doing what it needs to do. So a few other tendons in your hip/knee/calf try to step up to the plate and work overtime to make up for an inflamed IT band. And then, because they're workign overtime, they get inflamed too. That's basically what has happened - and it's all a result of a glute that just decides to hang out and not do anything. Apparently. The physical therapist said that we'll work on training my brain to use my glute muscle when I walk (and eventually when I run) as well as strengthening the glute. We'll also work on some hip-flexor flexibility. And she's going to "untangle" my IT band with "deep massage," which she says will be painful but whatever - I just want to run. For now, I have to do these stretches (4 of them, holding for 5 minutes each) three - five times a day and I have to force myself to not run. I may do the elliptical. I hate the elliptical but I'm goign to have to try to love it. She says after the stretches, she'll add other strength stuff. She says that her goal is for me to be able to run 6 miles, 4x a week, pain free in 8 weeks. That seems like it'll take forever - and I'm used to running more than a total of 24 miles a week, but it's better than having to take MONTHS off of running I guess. She told me that if I keep running, eventually something will tear or snap and it'll be way worse. She told me to be prepared to be in pain at our next appointment as she's going to start "untangling the tendons." she seems to know what she's doing...

Frozen yogurt store was CRAZY BUSY today. INSANE. And I made THIRTY CENTS in tips. HAHAHA. I normally make 10 dollars in tips!!!

Saw my roommate's new apt. It'll be cute when she's all done putting stuff away.

Tomorrow (Tuesday)
-Wake up
-PT stretches
-breakfast/advil
-Elliptical (gotta practice pretending like I love it)
-PT stretches
-write a recommendation for someone for a job app
-lunch/advil
-move stuff from apt1 - apt2
-PT streches
-dinner
-work at fro yo store (6pm - 11pm)
-snack
-PT streches